A few weeks’ ago early one morning the old fella jumped in the car & said he wanted to see if he hadn’t lost any of his driving technique having been unable to drive for the past eighteen months owing to the stroke.
“Jump in” he said.
To say that I was astonished was a slight understatement and as I hadn’t yet had a superhero strength breakfast I wasn’t exactly sure that I was up to the task in hand.
After putting the key in the ignition his size eleven feet hit the pedals and the roaring noise coming from the engine must have awoken the entire village. As we juddered away from the kerb I regretted not having brought a pair of ear defenders along with me.
A few minutes down the road my Dad pulled over and smiling said “I’ve forgotten where all the controls are” which didn’t exactly fill me with confidence.
I suggested we take the back roads, “nonsense” he scoffed. The white knuckle ride down a steep incline nearly resulted in my forehead smacking into the dashboard three or four times as my Dad hit the foot brake just a tad too heavy and I tried to negotiate with the Almighty about extending my life expectancy a little further than that morning in exchange for less erratic attendance at our local parish church.
The journey took three times longer on account of all the detours we took to avoid hills so that the old fella wouldn’t have to carry out a hill start; our home county Devon is all about the hills.
Not for the first time that morning I wondered whether I was in some Bob Newhart sketch where I was the terrified driving instructor and my Dad was the clueless pupil; no doubt the amount of expletives I was muttering under my breath would probably ensure I was never going to Heaven anyway.
“Deborah, will you just jiggle those mirror thingamys around” as he was parallel parking outside the medical centre. As he revved the engine harder than Lewis Hamilton’s Formula One Mercedes and smoked billowed out from the exhaust, he managed to attract an appreciative audience who were beginning to take bets on whether he would manage the herculean task. As it happened the receptionist had been alerted to my father’s arrival by the speed of sound and brought his repeat prescription out to the car.
Turning to me Dad said “That was good of her, wondered how she knew we were here”
I replied that it was likely that they had probably been able to hear us in Yorkshire unless they were in a medically induced coma and not wanting a repeat performance suggested he leave the car on the drive when we returned home.
As we pulled up we were met by my two nieces who were brandishing their provisional driving licences and trying to cajole me into taking them for a driving lesson
Jumping out of the car I smiled sweetly and said “No problem, Grandad’ll take you, I’m all out of brave pills”.
. . a Devon Cream Tea (laced with whisky) will set you up for more outings – trust me, I’m a doctor!
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I love the way you think Alan
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to quote that song from long ago – ‘. . but you don’t know me!’ 🙂
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I’ve been singing that song since I looked it up on Youtube & played the Michael Buble version. Of course, the old fella loves it
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I love that you go where “angels fear to tread.” Hugs coming across the pond!❤️💛❤️
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Now Rebecca that was very clever!
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Ah, a great story. Don’t know whether to laugh or cry as you referred to your Dad as the old fella. At any rate, you survived. Now, just don’t get in the car unless you are the driver. But I bet your dad was very proud of his accomplishment.
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Our ever growing four legged family are all fairly elderly now so he fits right in
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That’s great for dad and the four legged members. Most of my animals are old, so we are all in the same boat. 🙂 Dreadful thought- the aging thing. But we keep plugging away. I love your sense of humor. It surely helps.
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Laughed along with that as I knew it would end well but goodness, that must have been scary 😀
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I remember the panic when hubby was starting to lose his ‘touch’ on the pedals. It does get the pulse racing, but it did seem that he enjoyed the remaining freedom while he could. How very brave of you to go along for the hair-raising ride!
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Arrgh, no one ever wanted to drive with my father and that was when he was 50. He simply drove like a manic and the devil was trying to catch him. You are a brave woman, I am impressed. ❤
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I guess I knew you had to have survived to write this blogpost, but I was torn between laughing and shaking with fear. I am so glad you lived to tell the tale!
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And like many out there my Dad thinks he’s the best driver in the world but then again don’t we all?
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I would be pretty scared, and especially on the roads in England. (When driving there, I used to put a Learner “L” in the back window of the rental car so other drivers would know to give me a wide allowance.
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Every once in a while I spy you on FB or some such and try to remember to come and say hi! Made it this morning 🙂 And your driving tale couldn’t resonate more loudly. Mine has just had a bump ironed out by the garage but insists that at 87 he’s fine driving. Unfortunately he’s the only one who thinks so. 😦 I’m due for a scary ride home when he comes back for tea tonight, after I’ve nipped over to do a bit of cleaning. Would you cross your fingers for me please? 🙂
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Always nice to hear from you Jo & hope life is being kind to you. I feel your pain & the only advice I can give you is to keep your eyes closed!
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Oh no! That results in a sickly feeling. I’d rather see trouble looming. At least then I can grab the wheel 🙂 (and I’m a non-driver 🙂 )
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Ha, lovely to know he is able to drive, even if it required you to down an entire bottle of brave pills 🙂
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